How to Deal With Co-Parenting Issues After a Divorce?

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There is no way to sugarcoat it. Co-parenting can be tough, especially in the beginning. You, your former spouse, and your children are all dealing with some major life changes and your new arrangements are going to be a big adjustment. Knowing how to deal with co-parenting issues in a healthy way can make everything less stressful. And if something needs to change with your co-parenting arrangement, a Suffolk County child visitation lawyer from our firm may be able to help.

What Are Some Common Co-Parenting Issues?

If you are trying to co-parent, you are probably going to run into one of these issues eventually. Common parenting problems include:

Communication is toxic: You and your ex just cannot communicate with each other without the conversation turning toxic quickly. Whether you are talking in person, texting, or emailing, it is nearly impossible to have a conversation without someone lashing out.

Constant criticism: Parents have different parenting styles, and that is mostly okay as long as the child is well cared for. Some parents just cannot help themselves though, and they just keep criticizing their former partner’s way of doing things. That creates conflict.

You cannot see each other: You and your former spouse cannot even handle pickup or dropoff duty without getting into a fight. If things are that volatile between you, that is just going to make co-parenting more difficult.

How Can I Approach Co-Parenting Issues?

Fortunately, there are some ways to deal with common co-parenting problems without making the situation worse for you and your children. Some of our suggestions include:

Try the “gray rock” response: If your ex continues to antagonize you over text or in person, reevaluate how you respond. Instead of returning any barbs with the same emotion, just ignore your ex and go “gray rock.” No emotions and no hurling back insults.

Focus on your own behavior: You cannot control your ex, but you can control yourself. Do your best to keep yourself in check even if your ex insists on making every dropoff or pickup an ordeal. Just do not be the oxygen feeding their fire.

Work on yourself: If you still have a lot of anger over your divorce, consider talking to a therapist. They can help you work through your issues and help you focus on what really matters here, your children.

When Do I Need a Lawyer?

In some cases, the child visitation schedule just needs to be changed if you want to avoid future problems. That is when you should have an attorney by your side. An experienced family lawyer can help if you:

  • Need to adjust pickup and dropoff times
  • Need to change pickup or dropoff to a different location, like a public place
  • Want all non-emergency communication to go through lawyers
  • Require other adjustments to visitation and custody agreements

You do not have to deal with all co-parenting issues on your own. Sometimes an attorney can help.

Contact Our Legal Team

If you are having any problems with your current co-parenting arrangements, contact Peter V. Mandi & Associates, Inc. Schedule a consultation and learn more about how we can assist you with any of your family law issues.

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